Am I the only one?

Hoodoo, also known as conjure, is a form of predominantly African-American traditional folk magic that developed from the syncretism of a number of separate cultures and magical traditions. It incorporates practices from African and Native American traditions, as well as some European magical practices and grimoires. While folk practices like hoodoo are trans-cultural phenomena, what is particularly innovative in this tradition is the "remarkably efficacious use of biblical figures" in its practices and in the lives of its practitioners.[1] This definition was taken from WIKIPEDIA. This is where I have planted myself firmly into the middle of. That being said, I do not use the saints or biblical figures. I lean more to the Native American symbols. Conjure is the closest thing I know to what it is I do. I guess this is what makes me unique and original. Im not a traditional by any means...but I am original FOR SURE! If Im not let me know who else does what I do? Im serious. I could use pointers and guidance.

another step...

A lot has happened since my last post. I lost most of my home in a flood from hurricane Issac. I have also taken another step to learning what my heart so dearly longs for. I may have found my way into a much deeper form of education. ...and so my journey goes... as the African proverb says "A journey that only goes in a straight line does not discover much about life or living."

getting to know me

me and my hubby

Terrorism has hit home

It has been a long long time since I have written anything. I have been so busy helping my brother getting his new home ready to move into. Today is a day of sadness. We mourn the loss of 2 of our officers and friends who were ambushed and killed. Im sitting here thinking what would cause this. Yes this was an act of terrorism. A young man from the plains got his head all twisted up into thinking that anyone who opposed his thinking would be dealt with and any cop he sees will be killed on sight. He made what is considered to be terrorism threats to police in Kansas after being in a bar in Nebraska. From there he went to Shreveport Louisiana and met up with the Smith family and began to stock pile guns. The authorities had set up a surveillance team in the trailer court to keep an eye on them. Its not clear if they robbed the laundromat or if someone else did but the sign of police in their trailer court caused the smith family and this terrorist to move to my semi-sleepy little town. We have had our share of trouble here. After all we are close to New Orleans. This has taken everyone by our ears and shaken us to the core of our beings. This wasnt drugs or someone on a rampage from a domestic problem. This was calculated murder of police officers. They engaged gunfire on unsuspecting traffic cops directing traffic. They knew the officers would be there, they are there every morning and afternoon for shift change at the plant. What they didnt know is that our officers and civilians alike dont put up with law breakers. A civilian was key in helping to locate the car after it sped away. Two officers died during the ambush while trying to make an arrest of unarmed suspects. The two officers who were originally fired on will survive. Louisiana doesnt play. We WILL shoot you if you cross a line. We will defend our property and we will make sure that justice is served. We have the long arm of the law and we have long memories. We will mourn our dead for generations and we will never forget. You can bet that these terrorists will not only get the death penalty, they will be haunted by every family member, dead and alive, affected by these tragic deaths. You ran for a year Kyle Joekel, you got your wish, you killed a couple of cops. May you know the kind of pain you caused and may Louisiana take no mercy on your life or soul. ...and to the Smith family, I have no words for a resident that would kill the people who protected you. You are scum. You know whats coming to you. You provided the guns to a terrorist. You should be tried and hung for treason and then spat on after death. In writing this blog I can see my sorrow turning to anger. Anger that doesnt do a thing to help the six children who had fathers two days ago and dont now. In these tough times I sure hope we can help the widows with thier up and coming struggles. ....I must try to remain focused.... To all you Savage Nation, Rush Limbaugh types... is this what you wanted? Children without fathers? Wives without husbands? you talk and talk and talk about anarchy and govt take over but you dont think about the people. you are creating extremists which is causing the govt to crack down even harder.

oh that feeling....

Have you ever had that feeling if needing to cry but cant? Or knowing that there is something worth crying over but dont know what it is? I dont even know if this feeling is real, if it belongs to me, or belongs to a spirit who is trying to communicate with me or through me. All I know is that I cant seem to shake this thing off. I am stressed over many things this week and was put through a very traumatic experience. It is over and done with so I should be better from it. I am so aggravated and sad. I hope my feelings are simply anxiety and not anything forthcoming.

ramble of the day

Today I was having a conversation with a friend known to be a bit of a hot head. It seems everything that he doesnt agree with upsets him to some degree. He tries so hard to be open minded but there are some places he just cant go. I love this man like I love my brother. He has trouble accepting that someone might say something bad or what might be perceived as bad and it aggravates him no end. I find that yes it is aggravating. Is it that this person (insulting) thinks so little of someone else they have to voice it? Is it that we anger over this because it is in some way true? Can someone really see this in a person and is just being honest? In that case who should we be angry at? I personally think that people put labels on others because they have to compartmentalize personalities as their own lives have been experienced. Someone might call me a bitch and fat old hag because they are used to having sweet young pretty submissive complacent women around them. either that or I remind them of someone they have already had a bad experience with. It has to reflection on me and my life what so ever. I was the same person a minute before the statement was made. It will however allow me to see them in a new light. I dont have to like what they say but what they say is just a window into their lives. It is not an easy concept. We have all had our feelings hurt by words. But I believe we need to see why it is we are upset. I cannot change what people see in me. I cannot change why they see it. I can only hope that in the end my heart will show them that perhaps they have put me in the wrong category. As for my dear sweet brother from another mother, he knows I adore him...even when he gets pissy.

Put between a rock and a hard place

This has been an unbelievable time for me. I am reeling from a predicament I was thrust into. It all started off innocently enough. A laugh here and hug there. Just as with all my friends husbands I expected the utmost honor. I was wrong. A friends husband contacted me for much much more than advice and a joke. I was put into a place where I had to tell my friend her husband is a cheat. This is not the first time this has happened to me. Men think I am cool and will "go there" just because I am open an honest about who and what I am. What they dont realize is that above all, I am honest. I have been a wife who trusted her husband who was a cheat. I have been lied to. I know what it feels like and why the wife needs to know when her husband is risking her life buy screwing around on her. I was petrified for her, for our friendship, for the group of friends I know her through, her family, and just about everything she and I have anything to do with including my reputation. I was sick for days trying to decide if I had misunderstood what went down. I re-read the conversation between us. There was no misunderstanding it. Then I thought ok maybe he was just living out a fantasy by talking to me that way. So I let it slide. I let it slide until the next time we went out and he was all over every woman but his wife. It made me sick. I knew then, what I had to do. I dont know why people do things like this. The whole thing was so insane, selfish, and hurtful. I hate what he did to her. I hate what he did to me. I hate what he did to our friendship and the friendship of the girls. I despise what he has done to his family. He reminds me so much of my ex husband. So sweet, funny, and understanding. The only thing he really understands is his sex drive, everything else is a lie. Its so sad, and infuriating. I have been crying all week.