Reason For The Season

It was reported this morning that 66% of the people in the USA will celebrate Christmas with gift giving. Of the 66% only 40% are Christians. A comment was made about Christmas being about the buying and selling of gifts.
I believe they have it wrong. The original reason for gift giving is to express Christ like behavior in giving to those who are in need. Gifts say more than "stay warm, eat well" Some people need something more than a physical need. A gift can easily express what words are so hard to say.

When I was a teen I had few friends and thought my family hated me. One very precious time my brother spent an evening with me just reading words from the dictionary. We made up silly pronunciations and definitions. Laughter filled the house and our hearts. It is a time we both remember and refer to as how we feel about each other. We fight more than any other siblings I have met. Its hard to say I love you to someone you are angry with. But sending a gift....a copy of the exact dictionary we read from that night....that says it all.
My brother needs to know he is loved. He lives alone and has a life I wouldnt want for a dog. I cant live with him but I do love him and what better time to say it?. And in what better way?

Gifts are important, not for the economy but for he morale and well being of others. When morale and well being are in place the economy will take care of itself. People will be willing to work, play, spend, and live life to its fullest.

blessings to you.

Have a Cool Yule

Winters Magic

Winter comes with its own type of magic.

For some folks, Winter is a time for family and creativity. The beginning of winter brings a holiday season filled with cooking, decorating, family and fun. It becomes a precursor to a long awaited quiet time of year to rest and perhaps plan for the coming spring. Sitting by a fire reading a book or knitting while the man of the house works on whittling the next little project of amazing craftsmanship. Although this may be a scene from days gone past, most of us hold dear the notion we can still create in our hearts and minds what our spirit longs for.

For others, winter is a time of human durability. A time for struggles and challenges brought with severe weather and shortage of food and warmth coupled with isolation. A true test of physical and mental strength.

In any case it creates a different kind of life that is a magic of its own.
Snow and ice, and the stillness winter makes, opens the mind to a less complicated and more primal way of living. Sure we have our jobs and same old daily routines but winter alters them enough to get us to pay attention. Our driveways need to be cleared. Our car's engines need to be warmed before we can drive anywhere. We spend just as much time looking for our gloves as we do our car keys. When we see someone walking, the first thing we think is "does that person have shelter?". It is a time when we are forced to consider how nature really is.


Blue are the nights lit by stars reflecting on the calm stillness of snow.
I hear the soft footing of a deer foraging for the last bit of grass as it keeps moving so its blood wont freeze in the dead of night.
I can hear the ice crackle as the sun breaks late in the morning. The cardinals chirping in the pines as the raven calls out good morning. The smell of burning wood fills my mind with memories of my childhood when I spent hours building snowmen and drinking hot chocolate.
What a joy this time of year can be if we only take the time to live with it and not fight against it.

Blessed Be

In the mist of this foggy morning, rain begins to fall. It is the end of harvest and we are all settling in for winter. The holiday tree has been decorated. Not for us but for those who will be visiting in the coming weeks. It is time to share what we have worked so hard all year for. I will bake, clean, and cook for as many people as care to stop by to spread cheer. This coming month is for friends and family as well as total strangers. This is the month that my ancestral blood kicks in and allows me to welcome good folk with open arms into my life.

Blessed be to those who care for those less fortunate. Blessed be to those for forgive past arguments. And blessed be who love, regardless of condition.

If Today Was Your Last Day

I woke up this morning with the realization that today could be my last day alive. How would I spend today? My heart sank. There are so many things I would love to say to so many people. I have done what I can do but I haven't said what I could or should say.

Today I am going to say what I need to say.

To Dennis:
You have taught me to laugh at myself. I dont know if you know how important that is. You do it so often its second nature to you. You are the only person I know who seriously knows how to laugh.... at everything. Life is a funny thing and its meant to be enjoyed. Do me a favor...go enjoy it. He who laughs last is the last one laughing. Laughing is good when you have someone to share it with.

To Robyn,
Robyn you are like my sister. I love you and so much of what you do reminds me of my mom. That is a good thing because you made me remember how much I loved my mother. Sure we had our fights and sure we had our differences but I loved her. Just as I love you.

Frances,
Dear friend. You remind me to be gentle with people. You have taught me that not everyone thinks the same and thats ok. I used to think everyone was so different than me. You have taught me that I am the same as everyone else and I am not a stranger to this world.

Sean,
My gayband LOL the one who can inject humor into any situation and make me laugh after you hit the button that will send me into a tizzy. You have such an impact on peoples lives. You spread the ever so unpopular hand of opposite thinking. You teach as well as love. You are a world apart. Just dont ever forget your world isnt the only world people see.

To my online coven:
I treasure the sacred space created in trust and love. That sounds so Wiccan but believe me its from the heart not some spell book with 101 listed in it. Always remember what the group stands for and how comfortable being small is.

To Raventalker:
You are such a gift to the world. The words you give reach the very soul of me. I have cried over how selfish I have been when I see you put to print what my heart has been screaming at me. I could never be as gracious and kind. You are like no other and it is pure pleasure to have been in your presence even for a day.

To Bucky:
Friend for life. You are one of a kind. I love you. and thank you. Do what makes you happy. Money doesnt matter in the end. Now crack some form of sarcasm and let Doug glare at you. It makes me laugh.

To Tim:
Bro? good grief! let it go. Forget the garbage all the world has and just love. Love with all your heart. Be whole. Forget about politics and religion and business. Just love. In the end thats all there is, and if you dont have it what do you have? Remember how we laughed reading the dictionary? Remember when you bought yellow dog for me when I was sick? THATS love! its selfless and all consuming. Let it take over like it used to do.

To Brian:
Most people saw me running from difficult situations because they saw me "afraid" of them. Thats not what it was. What I was running from was, making people uncomfortable with myself. I figured if I stayed away I wouldnt hurt the people I loved so very much. I had it in my brain that my personality was more damaging to others than to myself and if I hurt as bad as I did I couldnt imagine how badly I hurt others...so I stayed away. I stayed away because I love you. I now know I was so wrong. I am so sorry.

To Dan,
Fuck you! nuff said! if I ever see you again it will be to soon. Oh and by the way. If I die before you, Im haunting your ass til your head splits.

To my children:
I did what I could. Keep your heads held high and always know I never stopped loving you no matter what! code kisses!


To Tess
My adopted sis. Stop fretting so much. I dont know anyone who worries as much as you do, not even me. (and thats saying something) I know its hard but worry makes it worse. Love with all you have, smile and enjoy today. Always enjoy today.

And Finally Doug:
My heart and soul, my life and death. Take a deep breath, dont count, just let it out. Feel the air, feel the life, feel me. I will be with you always. I know I nag you some, but thats what a wife is supposed to do right? You always asked me to be myself. Im still not sure who that is but I can say you have brought me closer to knowing more than anyone else ever has. A gift I could never repay. I only hope that I have touched you the same way you have touched me. The only other thing I think I should say is "dont wait" life is to short. You dont have to be sure of something to be happy about it. Ride with the waves and enjoy. I love you. I love you. I love you. With all I am and ever will be.

Wal-Mart

WAKE UP AMERICA! Wal-Mart is forcing other businesses out of business! Its not about lower prices, its about c getting the small businessman out of America. Do you think I am wrong? Try this out for size.

Wal-Mart opened a store in this small town I live in. The local art shop only lasted six months. There is no way a small store can compete with the global economy of hiring workers from China to make your product for you. Now that the local art supply stores in the area are all gone, Wal-Mart is getting rid of their art supply section. What are the artist suppose to do? This might not seem like a big deal to you, after all its only art right? what if they put all the electronic stores out of business and stopped carrying electronics? They have shut down local butcher shops, hardware stores and auto mechanics shops. what will happen to us when they say they wont supply us with these services anymore? We will be like old Russia standing in line for bread and soup and toilet paper because we wont have jobs or businesses and we will be "told" what we can and cant have.

We Need Help

this is a picture posted by the Times Picayune NOLA.com
It is a picture of Dan Walter Kerry who was shot and killed going to a local fair on Sunday. He was just 16 years old.



In the past 3 days there have been five people shot and killed in the New Orleans area. These have been individual instances that have somehow gripped my heart. Most of the murders are teens. Think about it TEENS! What were you doing at 14, 16, 18? I was going to football games, homecoming dances, rollerskating and hanging out with my friends at slumber parties. Sure we drank a beer once in a while but we stayed out of major trouble. It is hard for me to comprehend that these people are involved with things that are getting them killed at such a young age. Further more, its hard to believe I live here watching it go down. Tuesday night and a 17 year old is lying dead in the street. How could anyone put anything over a life?

Thugs have no respect for life until its their own that has been taken or dissed. Can't dis a homey ya know what I'm sayin? (as they cock a pistol and point it your way) When did life get so unimportant? How does an entire mentality snap and think money or even words are more important than life? I just dont understand.

I weep for the people who live in this kind of culture. I weep for the dead and I weep for those who kill. May the gods grant safety to the ones who dont want to live there and cant leave. I wish we could just shout STOP and have it be so.

5 dead in 3 days.... 5 dead in 3 days..... 5 dead..... and I cry because tomorrow is another day that I will look in the crime section and probably see another story that says "police are asking for any information about this shooting please call crime stoppers" then it will be 6 dead in 4 days.

STOP!

shout

shout shout let it all out, these are the thing I can do without come on Im talking to you come on.

In violent times, you shouldn't have to sell your soul. In black and white, they really really ought to know,

those one track minds that took you for a working whore, kiss them goodbye you shouldn't have to jump for joy you shouldn't have to shout for joy.

they gave you life, and in return you gave them hell. as cold as ice I hope we live to tell the tale.

and when you've taken down your guard, If I could change your mind,
I'd really like to break your heart. I'd really like to shake your heart.


its a simple song, what does it mean? I believe it means in order for there to be change there has to be some sort of turmoil. and they are asking why. Why indeed. why must it be this way? why cant we just move past all the crap. Why must people die in order for the rest of us to know how to live? Why must there be hate in order for us to know what love is? what an insane place we live in.

HATE

It has occurred to me that some people are filled with so much hate that they tend to twist everything ever taught them.

I was involved in a conversation with someone about the native Americans and the pilgrims/puritans. My knowledge of the puritans is that 1/2 of them died. They knew nothing of the land. The natives taught them how to survive. Thanksgiving was born.

The person I was having a conversation with refused to celebrate thanksgiving because the whites killed the natives and she wouldnt celebrate that. She refused to believe that the pilgrims were thankful of the lessons learned in how to survive here.

Pardon me but WTF? How much self hate can a person have that she could put that hate into history of the first pilgrims whos lives were saved. I was told that I have rose colored glasses and that I dont see the truth. Again WTF?

Squanto the native American who spoke English because he was a slave in England years before, took mercy on the Puritans. I celebrate the Native culture and their acceptance of us. http://www.history.com/topics/thanksgiving it is a remarkable story.

and to the person filled with hate... screw your self hatred, I love the Native American people, their generosity, kindnesses and knowledge of the land. I am thankful for the friendships made in history and in present. I will not be a part of the growing hatred about my culture and what my ancestors have done. I can only be me. My path is a path I want to bridge over the wrong. I dont deny that wrong has happened but I am not going to forget the good because of the bad either.

October is over

I missed the Samhain coven gathering and for that I am so sad. I must say, I had a blast doing the haunted house. I got so good at scaring I even made a couple of co workers jump LOL. Who knew I had this in me?

Spiritually its been an exhausting month. I have banished a conjured demon and its conjurer I have cast out spirits from a house where the young people were going crazy with worry about the spirits being evil. (silly people) I have rescued some very curious people doing wrong things for wrong reasons... Im tired and need a break.

Moral Magic

In the past week I have experienced some rather interesting thoughts on being moral. I know I have had thoughts on this before but this time I am forced to make a choice and the line is so gray I cant really see it.

I am involved in a very fun group activity of volunteer acting at a haunted house. My second night there I had experienced something of a real haunting within the building. Things like this dont bother me as I know spirits are everywhere. Since then I have been told stories of how a young lady who worked there last year ran screaming of evil and never returned. I have also both taken pictures and seen pictures of unexplained phenomena.

In curiosity to communicate, my co actors decided to bring in a Ouija board. I wasnt told about this until the next day to which my heart sank. I spent the better part of an hour closing all opened forms of communication to the spirit world. My co actors then tried to communicate with the spirit again. This time with no luck. I stuck around to give them a serious talking to about the dangers of opening the doors of communication without knowing what it is they are communicating with. I am not sure if they believed me or not until I opened the doors and asked them to ask how many spirits are there. They got a direct answer for the first time all night.

My problem with this is now they know what I do and part of who I am. They are a curious lot and really wish to have answers. Far to explosive to be serious or level headed about it.

I fear being pestered by my new friends because of my gift. Part of me wants to open the doors again and let them find out for themselves so they will learn the same way I did. Another part of me wants to be patient with them and wait it out. And yet another answer is to teach the entire group how to use the board right. I personally don't like boards because they have no feeling and I have found a lie can be better told without emotions aware.

I have a very important choice to make and to be honest I'm not sure which way I will go.

Completely Drained

After performing the most difficult magic of my life, I am completely drained. It has sapped me of just about any energy I would normally have. I don't want to eat or go anywhere or do anything. I assume that magic is working because I haven't heard anything else negative from the people who asked for help. I don't know how long his will last but when its over I will be sure to post a little of what I did.

Eating Organic

I was raised by a health food guru of sorts. Her reasoning behind eating healthy was to stay healthy and live longer. Though I agree eating healthy can make your body healthy, I can't agree with that it will make us live longer.

I have a friend making a life style choice to be vegan. This friend started it for health reasons to help with diabetes. In making this choice, the benefits are out weighing the struggles. All the excess weight has fallen off and my friend is feeling healthy. Is this going to make my friends life longer? I dont know. Moderate diet change and exercise might do the same thing. Who knows.

I believe that when we die we die. We cant stop death. The important thing about living on this planet is to be a part of it. What will you leave behind? I dont want to leave behind a body that will pollute the ground if I am put in it, or left on it. All these preservatives and chemicals I have ingested over the years might prolong my life and prolong my body after death but at what cost?

Most people want to eat healthy. Some people just want to eat what tastes good. I want to eat what I was meant to eat so that this earth will be balanced and the cycle will continue in a more healthy way.

after all isnt that what it is all about

how did you get named

I was named by my sister. My sister who I love soul to soul, but on the outside I have no contact with. Do I accept my name? Do I accept what it means? Should I? My last name is a name that isnt of my blood either. How complicated can it be? Who would I be if I wasnt me? My given name means "beloved" and middle name means "defender of honor" My Maiden name means "of the village" and holds a lot of military valor.

All in all that is a right honest and dignified name. My question is, Is it me? Am I beloved? if I am then by whom? am I defender of honor? only if I think its an honor worth defending. Do I have a right to keep my maiden name if it wasnt the name by blood I was supposed to have?

My biological fathers name means "of the oak grove" southern Michigan is not known for its oaks. I was born in Royal Oak and lived on Acorn street. Now I live in a land of oaks so so so far away from where I was born I almost feel lost..

My friends call ma Val. Val is a name meaning "of good health" However the name was shortened to Val from Valkyris. My husband gave me the name because he said his life was like a war I rescued him from death and despair.

During a vision quest a guide gave me a name I feel truly suits me. I wish I could change my name to that. it means, a song sung by one in a room of thirteen. But now that I am married would that be the right name for me to take?

for now I feel as if I could take all of them. I am a beloved defender of honor from a village and the oaks whos fathers and sons fight for my country and I sing alone my own song called life to rescue those i love in this world I call home.

TO MY SON

Do you know that your soul is of my soul such part,
That you seem to be fibre and cord of my heart?
None other can pain me as you, dear,can do,
None other can please me or praise me as you.

Remember the world will be quick with its blame,
If shadow or stain ever darken your name.
"Like mother, like son" is a saying so true,
The world will judge largely of "mother" by you.

Be yours then the task, if task it shall be,
To force the proud world to do homage to me.
Be sure it will say when it's verdict you've won,
" She reaped what she sowed, Lo! this is her son".

Margaret Johnston Griffin

10 ways

Someone sent me a rather funny little list of ways to piss of a pagan. I got to thinking about different ways people have offended me because of me not being of the same faith. I can laugh now but then it wasnt so funny then.

10 ways to piss of "this" Alternative spiritual practitioner

assume I wont accept a prayer because I dont follow your religion.

tell me Im going to hell

assume I know nothing about Christianity

tell me what I do is garbage

assume Im Wiccan

tell me I need mental help for talking to spirits

tell me I cant be what I am because I dont own a cat

come into my kitchen and ask for newt tails

be a man, and tell me "You must be casting a spell on me because I think Im am falling in love you."

confuse bitch with witch


yeah pretty funny huh? yes they all have been said to me LOL newt tails in the kitchen HAHAHAHA really.... the lizards and toads I keep in the altar cabinet. No self respecting cook keeps them in the kitchen. *bats eyelashes coyly* WEG

Katrina 5 years later

The question was asked to me, How did Katrina change me. This was my replay.

"I came to Louisiana to start a new life just 30 days before "she" hit. I was in a motel room west of the city and looking for an apartment. The storm was bad but our motel suffered no real damage that I could see.

The aftermath was the worst thing I have ever endured. I listened to people on the radio begging anyone to help other people stuck in their attics or stranded on roofs who were dying of dehydration. Everyone in the motel I was in was left crying and trying to find lost loved ones for weeks. Then weeks turned to months. I saw violence from people who were supposed to be helping. I saw people taking advantage of the stranded and helpless. I saw the worst in people that I never knew could happen.

I saw some good though. Local stores donating food that would have otherwise rotted. Motel owners doing everything they could to accommodate anyone looking for a place to rest a weary head.

How it all affected me is rather odd. High winds panic me. I now have several different friends in several different states that I can use for evacuation destinations. I dont trust any insurance company. But I have also made a more positive turn in behavior too. I try to understand people instead of blowing them off. I take the non-expressway roads to where I want to go hoping I will see something I can cherish. I take better care of the people I love and make sure they know I love them no matter what. I have learned that things can be replaced and not to sweat the small stuff. My heart is still breaking for those who lost and are still in turmoil over the trauma and drama the storm caused. May I never forget it either. I never want to be numb or indifferent to it. I want to remember what it is like to see a mothers face the day she found her child searching the shelters out of state, using my laptop . Her gratitude was over whelming. I never want to forget letting the children, who were staying at the motel, help me put up Christmas lights, and I was gently reminded about Kwanzaa and then Hanukkah and Yule. By the time my window was decorated it was so beautiful I cried. It made me realize "this is how its supposed to be".

I suppose I can say it changed me for the better."

epiphany

I was just sitting here looking at things I have collected over time. Little things that seem to have noting in common with each other. An arrowhead I found while gardening in Alabama, a basket made of birch, a little plaque that says "I am not African because I was born in Africa, I am African because Africa was born in me", a brass replica of a Viking ship, candles, an acorn, a poetry book and so many other little things like that.

I began to wonder why I have them, other than the simple reason I love them. What could they all mean? How do all these things speak as a whole conversation in a single topic other than "Val loves us". Munching on my bowl of barley cereal it came to me.
They all speak of things past. The beloved sense of old being made new in my life. They all connect to a time when nature was or is God and of wonder and growth. They speak of life and death and life again. They sound of poetry and meaning in all that is basic instinct and tribal. Not one piece says "I am modern and cold"

Could this be the story of me and my path? A loving connection to all that is old all that is of earth, of sky, of water and fire? What a cycle to learn rom only to find its been in my soul from the beginning.

for Isaac Bonewits R.I.P.

Blessed was your life on earth
Many of us felt your insights worth
Forgetting never the works you've done
With the Oaks you are now as one

Journey well teacher and friend
To you a message Id like to send
For all of those on the other side
Teach from beyond and do not hide

Roar like a lion for all to hear
Let us know that you are near
For when you do some will learn
What it means to adjourn.

WOW

I joined a new group hoping to learn more about what it is I do and why its happening to me of all people. I have been blessed with somewhat of a kindred.

how do I tell someone that every word they put on screen resonates with me to the core. I feel like a star struck fool and yet thirst for more every day.

In the past I have been bitter, a bit cynical, and down right frustrated with complicated definitions of what it is that I do and who I am. Now I just want more. More art, More poetry, More spells, More song, more everything.

There is such a freedom with this feeling. All I can say is thank you to the one I feel connected to and star struck by and I will remain constant with my learning.

I promise.

Peace in the Morning

I woke up this morning and there was peace. No buzzing in my head, nobody bothering me for this or that. It was nice for a change. Crow was telling me it was time to get up but what else is new? LOL. I sat down and wrote some in my blog on another forum hoping maybe some of my friends might "get it" I doubt if any of them will but hey, life is fun because we are all different right?
After getting the library and the art studio done, My friend called with a proposition.
I have much to do with my time now. I have been commissioned to sew...HA! this is going to be interesting I assure you. I would rather extract alligator teeth for a living but at least this task wont cost me more in health and life insurance.

My time in the spirit world has taken a back seat to the mundane of getting a life the world wont see as "out there". I still have Mr Man and who I now know as Sophie the playful one around to remind me of my duties. I could use a little advice on a new one who has shown up and likes to be noisy. So if any of you know how to handle a pesky one let me know. I have tried to tell it to hush and be polite and even said if it cant be quiet then it has to go. That didnt work. I have told it out-right to leave and it hasnt gone. Ugh! the only reason I want it gone is because my dog is getting jumpy when its around. The fact I cant get a feel on this one bothers me.

Its not my fault

Its not my fault my voice heals those who listen.
Its not my fault I see visions from the past and future.
Its not may fault spirits talk to me.
Its not my fault. Its not my fault.

Its not my fault deer trust me.
Its not my fault dog obeys me.
Its not my fault Raven comes to me.
Its not my fault cat loves me.
Its not my fault its not my fault.

Its not my fault my people left Europe.
Its not my fault they took your land.
Its not my fault they did what they did.
And its not my fault I am what I am.

I choose to listen to that unheard
I choose to pay forward what I have learned
I choose to be what was meant to be
I choose to be nothing other than me

I choose kindness over hatred
I choose truth over lie
I choose education of all things
I choose heart over mind

I choose life over death
but if death does come
I choose what is beyond it
where the ancestors are from.

knowing what you practice

I was reading today. something about Voodoo and Shamanism and herbal healing all in one. I am one of those people who says, look, as long as it works who cares. But to give repect where respect is due. Voodoo is very specific. Shamanism also has specific roots. herbal healing can be a part of many cultures and not all cultures have the same herbs used for the same healing.

I understand that using a title gets notoriety and people might pay more attention to it or you but lets be fare and respectful. Eclectic magic and healing does work, it just isnt looked at with much respect. The reason it doesnt get respect is because people tend to call it something its not.

If you are eclectic and have borrowed from other traditions...thats ok, just say you are eclectic and know what you are doing and know that it works. People will respect you more and your reputation will be better for it.

spell for the addict

this time is desperate
his time has come
to learn the lessons
for what hes done

crime and drugs
and self destruction
a lazy body
and confused heart

bind him and break him
and remold his mind
lay down the right path
that he can find

guide him away
if this wont change
if his path is chosen
and already named

give us the strength
to say good bye
and let him go
let trauma subside

we seek peace
when love has to be tough
but comes a time
when enough is enough

reasoning the psychic/spirit walker

It is said that some people see and speak to ghosts and other spirits. Those of the Shamanic teachings say that in order to see and speak to spirits you have to have come close to death or died and come back.

When you think about it this makes some sense. After all, if the spirits have seen you and you have seen them in the spirit world, would it not stand to reason that the spirits who have something to say, know who to contact now?

I believe that spirits communicate through what they know and how they know it. It doesnt mean that how they are able to express what they know is the way we would like, or understand. What might be scary to us is nothing more than description, clue, or fact to them. We living here in the mundane and so called civilized world are not accustomed to the ways of the dead and deathly. Accepting that though life can be beautiful, death is a part of it and isnt always pretty.

Whether or not you believe in ghost, spirits, or the other worlds, might have to do with if you have been there or not. I dont believe that everyone who dies comes back a believer. Only those the spirits can trust or those they believe who will understand have that privilege.

doing what I love

In thinking I might need to improve my lifestyle I have been considering going back to school. At this time in my life school is an option "if"
1. i could finish in a timely manor and apply my education to a career
2. my career choice pays more than the difference of the cost of school.

Taking this into consideration I have to say no to school. Its just not financially practical. I would have to take pre math and science classes just to pass the entrance. So I have been thinking of other ways to improve things. Asking myself questions like "what am I good at that people would pay for?" and "how would I build a business on doing what I love?" What is it that I love to do?

This....this is what I love to do. Spiritual awareness discovery of life and life beyond. How do I improve my life in a financial way with this? Art? maybe. I dont want to be one of those people who opens a shop and sells what could be mistaken or accused of being fake or fraudulent.

This is just another step in discovery I suppose. "how to apply who I am to what I should do with what I know" and another step in my journey arrives.......

Fluff in Shamanic Works

OK here is why I blame Christianity on the fluff in shamanic works.

if you look back in time Shamans were the tribal council head on how to rid the tribe of witchcraft and its curses. By doing this they would work their own brand of magic and warding.

Christianity says that magic and warding is no different than what the witch does so it is ALL witchcraft and will not be known as a "good" thing.

My take on much of the new age fluffyism is that because of the persecution made upon all who stray from "gods way" and the bible, made up crap was spoken to keep a practice alive. In turn i think its been taken as "fact" over the years and become more accepted by the general public (which are the Christians) Now that its all been misspoken by the laymen "anyone" can achieve shamanic trance work with practice and money can be made by writing on it.

so yeah I blame the Christians for making the original practice an evil thing and the practitioner having to hide the truth to stay alive without persecution.


Quacks are something else altogether. There are those who have achieved the ways of being a shamanic practitioner. They can do anything a Shaman can do. The problem is they do it for a lot of money for people they dont even know.
1.) Payment is always something of a controversy because a Shaman is supposed to be family or tribal. We as Americans have lost the idea of honesty. Getting something for free is not honest, its robbery.
2.) a Shaman is supposed to know the person s/he works on. If a person isnt ready emotionally, and foolishly seeks out a healing they arent ready for it is the shamans job to either prepare the person for the work to be done or turn the healing away.
2 b: preparing can take months or even years depending on the work at hand. I have seen so called Shamans charging as much as 1000 dollars for a healing or soul retrieval to a perfect stranger. a single one hour session of counseling does not let a person "know" another person.


I call these people quacks not because of the work they do, but why they do it. They are irresponsible and careless to the talent they have and give "real" Shamans a bad name.

back in the saddle

after a brief time of being down and out (so to speak) I am back up in the saddle. I wasnt expecting to bounce back this quick, but I have.

Lesson #1: Healing isnt about making things right, Its about making things better. I may be wrong for you but I am certainly not wrong for me.

Lesson #2: Being right for me isnt always or ever right for someone else. Agreeing to disagree is often a good place to leave things.

Lesson #3: Watching someone new and interesting live out part of their life can often put a new spin on yours, even if its stupid television. Gene Simmons stated, "it doesnt matter what you have, if you have something, someone else will want to buy it"

Lesson #4: sitting and stewing while angry only creates more anger. It doesnt calm you down, it doesnt let things pass. If there is a problem deal with it, if you are the problem then step away or someone will deal with it for you.

In the end when there is strife .....
1: (from within) there is a lack of growth. It means I am not maturing the way my spirit wants me to mature
2: (from without) if I have conflict or disagreement I am not mature enough to know what to do about it. which is why there is strife.

MORE BS

Feeling beat up and not fitting in yet again *sigh* I dont know why i keep trying. its insane i know. I keep expecting different results hoping someone will get it but nobody does, and if they do they certainly dont say they do. i dunno i think i need a cave.

if you are fluffy and into rainbow magic good for you. Just dont tell me its the only way.
if you are a trad thats cool, just dont tell me its the only way to be
if you are re constructionist of long lost belief system... its been lost and you cant do it online thats kind of an oxymoron, ya feel me?. its cool. just dont tell me its the only way to be.

by telling me your way is the only way or your way is the better way you are telling me that my gifts and my talents and my learning is useless and I shouldnt be doing it even though I have been doing it all my life. it hurts, it hurts a lot. it would be one thing if i was new to something like Norse, or Wicca, or Celtic ways.

i am going on hiatus .... be well good people and be true to yourselves

Laughing at myself

reputation and results are more important than title. most medical doctors say colic is just something babies get and it will pass, give the baby anti gas drops and sent a mother home with a screaming kid. there is a man here who cures colic by burning the baby's blanket and then passing the baby over the smoke...it freaking works! whos the doctor? the one with the title or the one with the cure? The title of doctor means that there was study done to know how heal and yet so many dont know their heads from their asses. it is said that "there are doctors and then there are doctors" language is far to limited. When i think of all the 15 yr old high priestesses out there, i think of how many of them are actually going to make GREAT witches? who knows? could be hundreds. it doesnt mean i follow their path but i have to respect the possibility. the fluffs who have proven themselves to want nothing more than a very christianized version of what witchcraft is, to me is a quack, just as a quack doctor is still a doctor....you know what i mean?
in the end words mean nothing, titles mean nothing....i say PROVE IT and that will mean everything.

after all the searching and defining and study.....sigh LOL

3 fold law

I was on a forum today and someone named a coven who he felt wronged him. He sighted that they turned him away and broke the 3 fold law. and yet he named the coven. doesnt that cause harm to the coven? was he trying to cause them the same hurt as they caused him? i thought the universe took care of that.

the 3 fold law means that what ever you do you get in return 3 times. if this is so i need some answers please.

1. if someone does good and good is returned 3 fold, in order to create balance in the universe, does this not mean someone HAS to do bad?

2. creating to much good for ones self is out of balance, and would create greed, gluttony, selfishness is this not bad and therefore creates balance?

3. and all in which i have to ask, does intent count when doing good?

4. if intent counts, isnt it all measured by thought not action?

5. why is there a 3 fold and commandment of harm none also?

6 what if i want bad things to happen to me so i can wallow in pity? harming people could be my avenue to do that.

7 is that why there is the harm none clause?

look i am not being cynical of religion and its practices. I frankly think some people need the practices to keep them in check. I just think that sometimes things look a bit odd to me.
I was brought up with the simple but effective sayings of "tit for tat" and "ya get what ya give" and anyone whos been in a fight knows that
1. thats a lie! someone always wins and someone always loses
2. even if it was true the person hurt wont ever be the same. and hurt for hurt only begets more hurt

be kind to each other good people. its simple. live, love and laugh, apologize, move forward, and be the best person you can be.

GRYPHONS NEST PAGAN FEST

Oh i am so excited. Gryphons nest is a Wiccan coven who respects and honors all paths including those like mine who lean more towards traditional ways. i spent a day with them for Ostara and i have to say, i was a little out of place not knowing the customs of Wicca as well as i should, however that was on me, i was welcomed with open arms and accepted as is and even got involved with a couple of really in depth conversations with the coven leader.

They are having a Pagan Festival Memorial Day weekend and they are having everything from real voodoo and dejembe classes all the way to the sky clad activities. my suggestion of having a burning of the Boog was even taken in as a good idea to have. YAY.

If you can make it here, bring your camping gear and swim suits....this is going to be an event to behold!!!!

Heathen or Pagan?

This morning i woke up to someones blog on Heathenism. The royal poobah and self proclaimed keeper of the blah blah blah was posting on what he is and what he isnt.

I have no problem with people and their beliefs. I adore the idea of gods as helpers or ones who make you stumble. the idea of being a mouse in their lives of cat like behavior is amusing to me. I would love to think i am being laughed at somewhere and this life is amusing.

however, when someone goes off on a tangent saying they are of the "old" ways and they are not neo this or that and they have the right to tell me what i am because i dont fit into their idea of what i say i am I WILL SCREAM from the rooftops.

!st of all, IF YOU ARE LIVING IN THIS DAY AND AGE YOU HAVE TO BE NEO!!!!! you have no choice. your soul and spirit might not like it but thats just the way it is. you were born in this day and age and you will die in this day and age and there is nothing you can do about it.

2nd of all. there is no way you can resurrect the ways of old without interjecting NEO thoughts and ideas into it. YOU ARE NEO. The ways of old have either died or morphed to stay alive in this NEO AGE. for gods sakes man you are posting a blog on the internet, do you think the vikings of old actually did that? fuck, most of them didnt even know how to write out their own runes. that was left to the scholars in the kindred.

3rd of all, If you seriously think you are of a way, i dare you to look up the definition. look up the word Heathen. then look up the word Pagan. hell look up every word you think you might fit into...do you really fit? even the Catholics dont practice the ways they used to, THEY HAD TO ADAPT

why is it trads always claim to "know" shit there is no way they could possibly know? its not like some book or something was uncovered that only they know about. good gods *holding head in hands* you people give me a headache.

i am so glad to be solitary in this day and age. it would seem that the general population has lost their minds. i know some of you are really quite wonderful people but the vast majority of you i would repel with garlic, a crucifix, fluffy words, wards of magic or a gun which ever would make you run faster.

its like swatting flies in a massive bug storm!! good gods the fruit loops are coming out of the woodwork this spring.

if you think you are a dragon and have super powers of x-men please keep that info to yourself. if you are seeking information to write a book and want to extract that information and not quote or give credit for it GO AWAY! if you are into something so different from society or a group of people you hang around, instead of spreading your info as "the only way to be" try finding a common thread in the group and focus on that! good gods people get a fucking grip!!!! spring is springing up, it doesnt mean you have to lose your minds! i know its been a long winter but you are bound to make the summer miserable for the rest of us if you keep it up.

Blessings to the Irish!

The history of the Irish in New Orleans is both rich and heartbreaking. People starving in their home land came to New Orleans hoping for a new start. What they found was not so wonderful. Put into slavery and treated worse than slaves and thought of as "expendable", the Irish immigrants in 1832 built the railways and canal that made New Orleans what it is today.

It is estimated that 30,000 Irish men died of malaria, accident, drowning, snake bites and eaten by alligators building a part of this city.

Because of the Irish peoples needs, a church was built to supply the people with religious comfort. That church is New Orleans' most famous building to date. Standing majestic in the center of the city, it is a sign of the hope, courage, and determination of a very stout people.

My first stop into the city six years go, was a place called Pat O'Briens. i didnt know the history and importance then, but i learned quickly.

Go rabh maith agaibh for your culture, your time, your traditions, and your lives. On a day where you celebrate your saint, i celebrate you.

Beannachtai na F'eile P'adraig oraibh

what to do?

....what does one do with talents so obscure? how do I put them in practice and make it matter? this is so frustrating. gah!

i know what i am

After a long long long time i now know what i am. a term came to my attention today that i have never heard before. after much study and many tears of recognition, the title will be taken.

before i say what it is, allow me to explain some of my frustration.

imagine being able to know of a past life from the time you are 2. imagine starting to travel to the other worlds by the age of 4. then becoming in love with art music and dance and cant live without any of it. add in psychic predictions, healing with hands, then healing of minds, and finally working energy and being in touch with spirits and gods on a daily basis.
I have been called gifted, cursed, blessed, strange, odd, wondrous, impossible, an angel, a witch, a shaman, stupid, smart, wise beyond my years and crazy.

i am happy to say i am all of the above. i am what they call a knower.

i have been crying all day with excitement and satisfaction that FINALLY something fits me like a glove.

....and so my work begins....

THE DAY NEW ORLEANS CRIED by val

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How this city used to make me smile.
And I knew if they had a chance
That they could make us sing and dance
And, maybe, we'd be happy for a while.

But february made me shiver
With every paper that was delivered.
Bad news on the doorstep;
I couldnt take one more breath.

I cant remember if I spit
When I read about the colts and how they did,
But something touched me deep inside
The day the new orleans cried.

So high high, with american pride.
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
And dem good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
Singin this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die"

Did you wear your black and gold,
And did you believe what you were told,
when we said that they would win?
Do you believe in rock n roll,
Can football save our mortal souls,
after katrinas deadly winds blow?

Well, I know that youre in love with them
`cause I saw you dancing in the gym.
Y'all just kicked up your shoes.
Man, I dig those saints and blues.

there was the denver broncin bucks
With a red carnations and western luck,
But I placed my bet for a buck.
The day new orleans cried.

I started singin,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."

Now fourty years we've been on our own
And moss grows fat on a rollin stone,
But thats not how its gonna be.
When the jester sang for the king and queen,
marching down the streets in new orleans
And a voice that came to you and me,

Oh, when the saints came marching down,
The king and queen did a noble bow.
when the courtroom was ajourned;
the verdict was returned.
its thirty one to seventeen,
final score for new orleans
you boys have answered all our dreams
you played the colts and they got creamed
The day new orleans cried.

We were singing,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."

Helter skelter in a football swelter.
colts fans flew off to a fallout shelter,
Eight feet high and falling fast.
It landed foul on the grass.
The players tried for a forward pass,
With the jester on the sidelines in a cast.

Now the half-time air was sweet perfume
the british came with who dat tunes
We all got up to dance,
Oh, the colts never had a chance!
`cause the saints took over the field;
The linemen refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed
The day the new orleans cried?

We started singing,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."


Oh, and there we were all in one place,
A generation lost in space
With no time left to start again.
So come on: drew be nimble, drew be quick!
and dont forget your winning trick
Cause prayer is our only friend.

Oh, and as I watched them on the stage
in history they turned a page.
No curse born in hell
Could break a new orleans saints spell.
And as the cheers climbed high into the night
To start the sacrificial rite,
I saw the saints laughing with delight
The day new orleans cried

they were singing,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."


I met a girl who sang the blues
And I asked her for some happy news,
she just smiled and said today.
I went down to the french quarter
Where Id heard the games from years before,
people marching down the corradore all the way.

And in the streets: the children screamed,
The lovers cried, and the poets dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
all our hearts no longer broken.
And the three men I admire most:
drew brees, the team , and the coach,
home they came for a parade to host
The day new orleans cried.

And they were singing,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."

They were singing,
"high high, on american pride."
Drove my chevy to the levee,
listening to the colts fry.
Them good old boys were being blessed and kept dry
singin, "this is not the day that we die.
"this is not the day that we die."

val 2010

thoughts on living in new orleans this week

You know? I arrived at this wonderful city thirty days before Katrina hit. The storm itself was someting to behold. A large ball of energy sucking the life from earth and all that live on her. For those of us who survived the storm and managed to stay in the area, a huge wall of sorrow went up like a bubble. I had never felt anything like it. I cried for months and in some areas that wall of sorrow is still there. I feel it as if it were my own. It makes me sick and makes me cry. I cant control the feelings I get when I enter the city and its neighborhoods.

Last night a football game was won and I instantly broke out into an overwhelming joy. I couldnt help myself. At first I questioned my reaction. After all, I dont like football and didnt even watch the game. Then I realized...It wasnt the winning of the game I was happy about. It was the feelings of all those people spreading outward and reaching me. I had people from all over te world contacting me and telling me how happy they were for New Orleans.

I dont know if a curse has been lifted or what. What I do know is that the people of New Orleans are soul filled, spiritual people and have no problem expressing to the world how they are.

I am here to tell New Orleans THANK YOU for reminding us all that we are spiritual people and can be touched in ways we never thought possible. Your heart and soul unite to tell us your story which in and of itself is so beautiful no one can deny it. We have felt your sorrow, and now your joy.

a day of insecurities

the title of witch is so ominous. the idea of being a witch and what a real witch is isnt what i am. a real witch is mostly self concerned. a neo witch is that which the christian defines as witch, rebellious against the church and authority practicing gifts not recognised by the church regardless of intention. i am not even sure about that title. shaman is a title that is given by a tribe to a person so that doesnt apply as i have no tribe.

i am mostly unaware of how my gifts are used. people tell me i heal them just by being around them. i know i practice obtaining a constant inflow of positive energy. i also practice traveling to other worlds to obtain knowledge for the betterment of self and others. i see and talk to spirits. i am so empathic i spend most of my time alone because being around people can be draining because i dont know how to turn it off. i recognize there is more than one god but i follow no god becuse it creates turmoil within me to choose one over another.

i am a simple woman living in a simple place with not so simple spiritual matters. i wish i had a purpose and a direction with it. definition is so hard to accept and understand. i am growing impatient with this rut i am in but have no idea how to get out of it.

Imbolc

there comes a time when the trees awake
to feel the sun and from the Earth they take
the soil of rebirth is replenished for growth
there comes a time
and the time called Imbolc